Bin Laden’s Plan to Ruin America: Make Joe Biden President!

Now, look, we should not make choices among candidates based on this sort of thing, but gosh, this is probably going to result in some awkwardness in the White House:

Before his death, Osama bin Laden boldly commanded his network to organize special cells in Afghanistan and Pakistan to attack the aircraft of President Obama and Gen. David H. Petraeus.

“The reason for concentrating on them,” the al-Qaeda leader explained to his top lieutenant, “is that Obama is the head of infidelity and killing him automatically will make [Vice President] Biden take over the presidency. . . . Biden is totally unprepared for that post, which will lead the U.S. into a crisis. As for Petraeus, he is the man of the hour . . . and killing him would alter the war’s path” in Afghanistan.

(Source).  My guess is Obama secretly had a laugh, and the secret service agent briefing Biden drew the short straw.

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Stratfor Personnel Guess bin Laden Was Not Buried at Sea and Somehow This is News

Back in my Patterico days, both I and Patrick were very hard on Obama’s decision to have bin Laden buried at sea, supposedly out of respect for Islamic tradition (except it wasn’t) before there was any independent verification that we actually killed him.  We felt that doign it that way robbed the families of the 9-11 victims of closure, and gave fertile ground for conspiracy theories.  And so now today via Althouse we get this article from the Wikileaking of Stratfor’s databases:

Leaked: Bin Laden not buried at sea, body moved on CIA plane to US

The body of Al-Qaeda leader Osama Bin Laden was not buried at sea, according to leaked emails of intelligence firm Stratfor, as revealed by WikiLeaks.

Wow, holy crap, that means the Obama administration was not as dumb about this as I thought.  I take it back, I mean...

Except, um, wait a minute:

Stratfor’s vice-president for intelligence, Fred Burton, believes the body was “bound for Dover, [Delaware] on [a] CIA plane” and then “onward to the Armed Forces Institute of Pathology in Bethesda [Maryland],” an email says.

(Emphasis added.)  Um, he believes?  As in he isn’t sure?

The official version is that the body of Al-Qaeda’s top man, who was killed by a US raid in Pakistan on May 2, 2011, was buried at an undisclosed location at sea in a proper Muslim ceremony.

"If body dumped at sea, which I doubt, the touch is very Adolph Eichman like. The Tribe did the same thing with the Nazi's ashes," Burton commented in another email. Eichman was one of the masterminds of the Holocaust by Nazi Germany. He was captured by Mossad agents in Argentina and, tried in Israel, found guilty and executed in 1962. His body was cremated and his ashes were scattered at sea over the Mediterranean.

“Which I doubt” means he is speculating...